Heather & Angie's adventure in the "yellow peril!"

Illustration by Nicloette Morgan

Thursday 10th July
My dear friend Angie arrived last night for a 7 day stay, weary from travel but very happy to be here, and I was excited because If there is anyone who knows how to have fun, it’s Angie
The two of us had a great time exploring some of the local stores, and visiting the hotel’s bars, restaurants and other wonderful facilities. The Renaissance has two beautiful pools overlooking the ocean this side of the harbor, and also operates a complimentary boat from the dock for guests to travel across to the private island resort.

We packed our sun tan lotion, snorkeling gear and reading material and headed over to the island. The island provides complimentary beach towels, and sun beds. There are two beaches on the island, a family beach with a restaurant, and a topless beach for couples. 7 Flamingo’s reside on the topless beach, and are extraordinarily tame; they are amusing to watch as they strut along the beach between the sunbathing tourists.

We found some fish food and the flamingos happily ate out of our hands. Aruba is famous for its iguanas, many of which can be seen by the boat dock as the hotel feeds them at midday.

Bob had to return to the States on business for a couple of weeks, so it was great having Angie to keep me company.

We both wanted to see more of the island so Angie decided to rent a car for a couple of days. The plan being to set off up the coast to Palm Beach.
Now I said car, but a more accurate description would be multi-shaded, luminous yellow, wobbly tin box about the size of an armchair, that rattled and squeaked, loudly. A delightful attention grabbing idiosyncrasy that we would happily have done without, having said that the squeak perfectly suited the personality of the vehicle, and I use the word vehicle with reservation.

However never one to look a gift horse in the mouth; Angie wanted to look at the time-share apartments within the hotels, she had rented the car, and she was driving, so I just went along for the ride.

Eager to get started I grabbed the door handle and it came off in my hand! Good start, I wonder what else is going to fall off before we’re done. Angie opened the door for me and I got in and threw the handle in the glove box, at least I don’t have to worry about locking the door when I get out!

It was a lovely sunny afternoon in Aruba as the two of us squeaked and rattled our way up the coast. The resorts at Palm Beach were all extremely busy, crowded with literally thousands of tourists, and the beaches much too busy for my liking. I have been thoroughly spoilt by all the beautiful, isolated beaches I have become accustomed to since living on Daisy, I don’t cope that well with crowds anymore. Similarly unimpressed, Angie decided we should move on, so we made our way back to our little yellow peril that we had left hidden in the back far corner of the parking lot.

We had no idea where we were going so we just headed further up the coast. We stopped along with coach loads of tourist’s at the California Lighthouse, which towers above the craggy Noordpunt, on the hilltop of Hudishibana. The views across the island from this location are absolutely stunning.

Angie and I decided to have lunch at the Italian restaurant next to the lighthouse, La Trattoria el Faro Blanco. There are spectacular views over the ocean from the restaurants outdoor terraces. Both the upper and lower terraces are roofed, providing diners with welcome shade. There is also a garden terrace, but with the blistering heat in Aruba I wouldn’t imagine the garden terrace gets much use during the day.

We both enjoyed a delicious lunch at our table overlooking the garden terrace and the ocean beyond. After lunch we set off around the island again. We managed to get lost more than once, but we did come across the Ostrich farm, the donkey sanctuary, and the beautiful Arikok National Park, which was getting ready to open in a couple of weeks. We saw many of Aruba’s famous divi divi trees, bent by northeasterly trade winds, they look like natures signposts, all pointing southwest.

That evening we drove back up the coast to Palm Beach looking for somewhere to have dinner, we stopped at an absolutely fantastic hotel, with marble floors, magnificent floral arrangements, uniformed doormen, and incredibly expensive décor. WOW, we were impressed, we hid the little yellow devil behind a small bush then casually waltzed through the lobby looking as bored and expensive as it was possible for us to look, “act like you belong” Angie always tells me when the two of us are tricking our way into places we’re not supposed to be.

We walked casually around the hotel stopping to read all the menus displayed outside the row of elegant restaurants within the hotel. There were no prices listed, it may as well have read, “You can’t afford to eat here so piss off”. So we held our heads high and made our way to the terrace. “Cocktails” Angie said, “lovely” I replied.

We found a table for two overlooking the hotel pool and manicured gardens below, with ocean beyond. Perfect timing as it was approaching sunset, we both sat back in our comfy chairs as the waitress approached and asked what we would like to drink. “A glass of Chardonnay, please” Angie said, “Merlot for me please” I added.

Within a couple of minutes she was back with our drinks. The wine was outstandingly good, and we looked wide-eyed at each other over the rim of the glasses as we took our first sip. I could almost see the dollar signs reflected in Angie’s eyes, “I think this is going to be expensive,” I said. “You think “ Angie laughed. Well the damage was done so we just decided to sit back enjoy the wine and the sunset, and wait for the bill.

Unfortunately the bill didn’t arrive, but the headwaiter and the bar manager did. “May we see your wristbands please,” Asked the waiter. “Wristbands” I repeated stupidly. “Yes, your wristbands, you are guests here at the hotel aren’t you”
Dumbfounded, Angie and I looked at each other, “no, we just came in for a drink, is there a problem?” Angie said. They looked at each other open-mouthed. “You’re not supposed to be here this is an all inclusive hotel.” The bar manager said. “OH well we didn’t know, I’m very sorry. If we could just pay for our drinks we’ll leave.” I smiled at them while reaching for my purse, but they didn’t smile back. “We don’t take cash, only the hotel casino takes cash.” I noticed that they were both starting to look angry as well as frustrated. “Well can we pay the casino?” I enquired. Again, more confused, angry looks. “No, the drinks came from the bar here.” The waiter said. “Well the drinks are in our stomachs now, so what would you suggest we do?” Angie said with a touch of sarcasm. The waiters continued to stand there looking at each other in bewilderment. “Well if we can’t pay you, perhaps we should just leave quietly,” I whispered picking up my bag and standing up. Angie did the same, and the two of us moved swiftly, but elegantly towards the exit, without once looking back; upon reaching the foyer we ran giggling like schoolgirls out to the yellow peril, lurking where we had left it behind the little bush, we jumped in and made a hasty if somewhat noisy getaway.