Where Will You Be?

Do you ever think about how much of our lives we actually control, and how much is decided for us, either through unexpected circumstance, choice, fate or blind intervention, do any of us really control our lives?  I wonder about this often.  For example: Are you today where you thought you would be, say 10/20 years ago?  Has life thrown you some totally unexpected  curve balls, surprise occurrences and opportunities that you chose to either accept or ignore, circumstances that completely changed the path you thought you were originally following?  

Sometimes I'm quite scared when I think about my future, mainly because of my crazy, roller coaster past, and when I look at where I am today, I'm not at all where I thought I would be at this time in my life.  It's not all been bad, but its certainly had it's moments, moments of crazy, off the wall, outside the box sort of terror and excitement, stuff I never even dreamed of.

Up to this exact point, my life has been quite extraordinary, I've been both blessed and cursed (depending upon how you view it) there has barely been a dull moment, and I've seen so much more of our wonderful planet (and ocean) than I ever dreamed I would.  The good side of that is that at 58 years of age I finally know what it is that I want from life, but sadly I'm a long way from actually getting it.

My wonderful husband, who I love more than my life, is currently pursuing his lifelong dream of sailing (something I hate with a passion), and getting ready to embark upon his life long dream, a circumnavigation starting in January 2013. 

So, at this stage in my life I'm not at all where I thought I would be, I'm living alone, I don't have a real home, my three wonderful children are spread across America from one coast to the next, my Mother and brother are 3000 miles away in England, and my husband is all over the place, either in the Caribbean on the boat, Europe, or briefly making flying visits to the States.  This truly is not where I thought I would be at this time in my life, but having said that, I still have goals, dreams and determination enough to make my dreams a reality.  

I truly believe that "If you are alive and breathing, you can make your dreams a reality, it only takes determination and effort." I just hope that I have the strength and determination enough to make my dreams a reality too :o)  This time next year I could be anywhere, who knows!

More Adventures on Daisy!

My brother Paul is doing his first trip on Daisy next week, helping Bob move her from Panama to Jamaica.  This will be a great introduction to Daisy prior to starting the circumnavigation in 8 months on January 6th 2013.
Paul is a really funny and talented writer, and is starting a blog to catalogue his travels and adventures aboard Crazy Daisy.
I'm including a link to his site, for all those of you that are interested.

Paul has done a lot of sailing over the years, but this will be his first circumnavigation.  So please follow him, and enjoy,  :o)

http://journalandremarks.wordpress.com/2012/04/16/secrets/

The Great Dane

I've loved with all my heart every dog that has blessed my life, but the one closest to my heart will always be Bowen, my beautiful black Great Dane.

It broke my and Bob's heart when he died, and Bob said he would never have another Great Dane because their life span is so short, and he couldn't go through that sort of heartache every 7 - 9 years.  The average life of a Dane is only 7 years, Bowen lived to 9 1/2, pretty good for a Dane, but we took really good care of him.
I've always wanted another, they truly are gentle giants, magnificent creatures, and it's an honor to have the chance to love and care for one.

The puppies especially are so unbelievably adorable they will melt your heart, they have massive feet, and coat's as soft as velvet, irresistible.   But I've decided that when I finally find a house in Atlanta rather than adopting a dog, I'm going to foster Great Danes. 

I do realize that this is going to be heart wrenchingly hard, as I will be taking the abandoned, neglected creatures into my home and nursing them back to mental and physical health, and then once they are well and healthy I'll have to hand them over to the homes found for them by the Great Dane Rescue, and that's going to be really hard, but I at the same time it will be a wonderful way of spending time with these fabulous creatures, and I will be doing something very worthwhile…

So we'll see how it goes, who knows maybe I'll get to keep one, one day!

There By The Grace of God Go I

I'm very aware that I moan and bitch constantly about stuff, stupid stuff, nonsense really, totally unimportant stuff in the whole scheme of things. Danni is constantly rolling her eyes and shaking her head at my frequent outbursts of dismay and bitchisim… Her all too frequent reminder is "we make our own happiness, just get on and deal with it and stop bitching."

And then, just occasionally, I get a wake up call, a gentle nudge that reminds me that I have nothing to really bitch about;  the "stuff" I have to deal with no matter how devastating I may think it is at the time, is frequently nothing in comparison to what some poor souls have to deal with, a fact that's all too easily overlooked when I feel as though I'm drowning in huge a slurry of crap. 

  

I may often feel as though I have a heavy workload of "stuff" to organize and fit around everyone else's stupidly impossible schedule, but its nothing I should lose sleep over, although I do lose sleep over everything all the time.  Recently I reached a point where I was crying frequently, exhausted, and just breaking down constantly over the silliest things.  It took a hard kick in the pants from Danni to get me to shape up and start dealing with everything, take control of my life back like a responsible adult, and I actually did it, I haven't shed a tear in a month, I have a healthier happier outlook, and I'm working really hard every day to maintain my positive happy outlook.  Mind over matter does work, you just have to work at it.

While I'm house hunting here in Atlanta, I'm being very useful and driving Nic to work every day while her truck is in the shop, being made road-worthy (we hope), and every morning on my way back home through the downtown area of Atlanta, I drive through the intersection of Monroe and Boulevard, and every morning at the same place I see this poor soul, a lady probably about my age maybe a little younger, at the junction, swaying in a sort of crazy drunken dance across the road from one side to the other, waving her arms about in the air while holding a bottle or a disposable cup.  The other morning it was around 80 degrees and she was wearing a spotted fur coat that looked as if it had been pulled out of a dumpster, the poor soul was dancing across the road waving the coat like a flag.  Her filthy blond hair is in dreadlocks through neglect, and her eyes are wild and quite scary like a cornered creature, I can't help thinking every morning when I see her how terribly sad she is, and I wonder whether she has any family, a Mother or sister or even a child somewhere, people who may not even know where she, is or whats happened to her,  I can't help but feel so very sorry for her horrible situation, and the thought runs through my mind each time I see her,  "there but for the grace of God go I." Seeing her every morning is a jolt of reality, a reminder of my good fortune, and a real reason to stop bitching and complaining about nonsense...

Daisy's demented life!

It's unlikely that I'll be posting anything on either of my blogs over the next 2 months while I'm busily searching for a house in Atlanta, and simultaneously packing up all my clutter and precious possessions in Columbus.  I'm hoping that once I'm settled into a new home I can (hopefully) locate all the dislocated pieces of my life, and put them all back in order once again.  

As Danni is now established in her new home, and the horses are close in a lovely (professional) barn, I can concentrate on my next move.

I'm so excited about establishing a routine, writing on a regular basis, starting a new catering business, planting a herb garden, rescuing a dog (or 2)  from the local pound, and pursuing my love of painting.

Having my feet firmly planted on solid ground once again is something I've dreamed about for the last 5 years.  As Bob puts everything in order for his 2013 circumnavigation I'll be planting tomatoes, and herbs, walking my dog/'s catering, writing and painting…

Hopefully I'll find some fun/slightly wicked stuff to write about…

Watch this space I'll be back :o)